Even When You Leave Me, You Will Be With Me
In my dream last night, you were there beside me, Gillian. I knew you were, but I never looked at you, spoke to you, or touched you.
We were in line to use a machine that would help transfer points of some futuristic sort overseas. In this time and age, it was the currency of the world. It was something that everyone did.
Behind us, was a nervous looking man. He was fidgety, but well-dressed. Youngish with a lost look to him. A bird learning to fly. He was the last in line.
In front of us, was a confident 20ish woman. She was attractive and adorned with raven tresses. I was chatting with her, about politics, the ugly clothes of the lady in front, and the idiocy of our current currency terminals. We laughed like secret confidantes, with our heads tilted toward one another, giggling like school children.
Finally it was her turn, and before she turned to leave, she asked me, "Are you flirting with me? Because I am with you, and I'd like to get to know you better."
At that moment I felt this tear inside me, and I was two people. I watched myself ask the woman, "Can I have your phone number?" And then the tear sealed, and I forced my body to laugh.
Then it was the bird man's turn. I watched him scratch and hit his own head, in an effort to figure out what he was supposed to do, what button he was supposed to press. The words on the screen that I had assumed were English, became a language of symbols before my eyes. I didn't understand it either.
But the bird man was in all states of anxiety and anguish. Kneeling on the ground, pulling at his hair, punching the floor...
And I wanted to help him. I could feel your need to help him too, Gillian. You have always been the kinder one, the one that gives the old man who fixes shoes, an extra 5 dollars. I wanted to help him, and I was encouraged to do it, because I felt you tell me too.
So from there, the dream rushes into an airport terminal, where I am buying tickets for the youngish man, and helping him to put structure into his life.
Everything vanishes, and I woke up sad.
I think even when I was dreaming it, I knew what it meant.
It is the story of my future.
Even when you aren't with me, I will always feel as if you are. You will always be an influence on my life. When facing any relationship in the future, I will always think of you first, before anything else. My personality, my actions, all influenced by you, Gillian. You've changed me. And I thank you for giving me that.
-Jacqueline
We were in line to use a machine that would help transfer points of some futuristic sort overseas. In this time and age, it was the currency of the world. It was something that everyone did.
Behind us, was a nervous looking man. He was fidgety, but well-dressed. Youngish with a lost look to him. A bird learning to fly. He was the last in line.
In front of us, was a confident 20ish woman. She was attractive and adorned with raven tresses. I was chatting with her, about politics, the ugly clothes of the lady in front, and the idiocy of our current currency terminals. We laughed like secret confidantes, with our heads tilted toward one another, giggling like school children.
Finally it was her turn, and before she turned to leave, she asked me, "Are you flirting with me? Because I am with you, and I'd like to get to know you better."
At that moment I felt this tear inside me, and I was two people. I watched myself ask the woman, "Can I have your phone number?" And then the tear sealed, and I forced my body to laugh.
Then it was the bird man's turn. I watched him scratch and hit his own head, in an effort to figure out what he was supposed to do, what button he was supposed to press. The words on the screen that I had assumed were English, became a language of symbols before my eyes. I didn't understand it either.
But the bird man was in all states of anxiety and anguish. Kneeling on the ground, pulling at his hair, punching the floor...
And I wanted to help him. I could feel your need to help him too, Gillian. You have always been the kinder one, the one that gives the old man who fixes shoes, an extra 5 dollars. I wanted to help him, and I was encouraged to do it, because I felt you tell me too.
So from there, the dream rushes into an airport terminal, where I am buying tickets for the youngish man, and helping him to put structure into his life.
Everything vanishes, and I woke up sad.
I think even when I was dreaming it, I knew what it meant.
It is the story of my future.
Even when you aren't with me, I will always feel as if you are. You will always be an influence on my life. When facing any relationship in the future, I will always think of you first, before anything else. My personality, my actions, all influenced by you, Gillian. You've changed me. And I thank you for giving me that.
-Jacqueline
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